As I continue to look back in old files, I keep finding content that basically affirms the questions I continue to explore. This article was printed a few years ago in the Diocese of Long Island publication that asked, ” where do I see Jesus today?” God is everywhere and yet we often limit where and how we experience the divine. This article explores how I have experienced the divine at my local watering hole.
My immediate reaction to this question, “Where do I see Jesus today?” –a bar stool or perhaps a pub. One of my favorite places is my local towny bar (a reference to a local watering hole that is populated mostly by people living in the community). I know that some of you, at this point, have decided that this is not the article for you, but, please, read on. I am very aware of the complex relationship people have with alcohol in our society. The culture of addiction related has caused serious injury and sometimes death to members of our families, our church communities, and our country. For some of us it is even more deeply personal. So the reflections offered here can show up at your local coffee shop, favorite restaurant, or community center.
The English model of the pub, is a “public house” or the living room of a community. Children are welcomed in a pub and families, friends and neighbors gather for good food, interesting conversations and the opportunity for updated gossip about the goings on of the community. I try to find spaces in New York City that resemble this approach to the watering hole. Living in such an urban environment, I sometimes forget to slow down long enough to have a genuine conversation and connection with neighbors. After a long commute on public transit, I need to be in a place that reminds me that all of humanity isn’t as crappy as it sometimes seems. Happy hour is a cost-effective and quiet opportunity to connect with strangers, learn about people’s lives and have authentic conversations. The awkward truth is that I have spoken more about my relationship with God and Jesus at the bar than in church meetings. So explore with me the characters I’ve encountered on a usual night.
First, the bartender. This person is like a priest. Although they might be nice because they want a good tip, they don’t really have to pay that much attention to a patron to make a good living. The key here is that they are willing to listen without judging. Like a confessional, they will for the most part, keep your business to themselves. I am not sure what it is about this person in this service position that makes people comfortable to talk about cancer recovery, divorce, loneliness, infidelities, you name it! I could easily say its the alcohol talking, but there is something deeper at work. The longing of this person to be heard is so intense that they find a trust-worthy person and unload their burdens. To watch the exchange of genuine authenticity is a transforming experience.
Next, the old drunk guy. He’s been going to happy hours so long that it is a way of being rather than a chosen act. He will propose to me at some point in the evening and I will again explain that “I could be your grandchild, but I am so flattered by the offer.” He will reveal intimate details about his life’s struggles and pains, his failed relationships, his journey to the US, his adventures as a professional dart thrower (I am not making this up). The only miracle being performed is a young person willing to acknowledge the wisdom in his stories, that he is not a bad person, but a person to whom bad things happened and he will continue on this journey growing each step of the way or ignore it all –his choice. Either way, each of us is transformed by this interaction whether we acknowledge it or not.
Pursuing Call 