Emerging

This summer I decided not to make any major life decisions. Not to work on myself. I wouldn’t go to therapy or care about how often I went to the bar or any of these things. Just have a fun summer. Then I went to music camp and started to write. I was broken open. Now I’m reading The Alchemist by Paulo Coelho again.

I think that empty summer thing is over. what are the things I want, I want a husband. I really feel strongly about that and I want a baby. It’s hard when you meet someone that could be that, but you aren’t sure that that is what they want, at least with you. I still think I am called to the priesthood and maybe I will be ready in a few years, or maybe I will just be excited about a career change that puts me on a path that feels really right and centers me a bit more. Who knows. For now, I would be happy with the boy I like calling me for a date. Or really any man that I might be interested in calling me for a date.

Will the universe conspire to make what I really want come true?